Fear

Here are a couple of quotes I've seen recently that have reminded me of an insight a colleague shared with me some years ago.

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." ~Yoda from Star Wars

"Named must your fear be before banish it you can." ~Yoda from Star Wars

It's a bit hard to explain the insight, but I can explain the process and remind myself that it works. Whenever confronted by some situation where a person seems to come up against you in anger, ask yourself, "What is the fear?"

This might apply to my own fear or the fear of the other person. When I can identify it, then I can deal with it and take appropriate action (or non-action). Always, my response must be from a position of compassion. When I do this stressful situations often dissipate.

Job Hunting

This job hunting business is difficult and at times disheartening, a real test of reliance on God. In the spirit of the original purpose of this blog, let me focus on the positive.

Reestablishing myself in the world of work, hopefully in the area of my experience and chosen career path, is a big part of this whole-life transition. It has been clear to me in the past that God has guided me in my work endeavors and has placed me where He wanted me to be. I trust this process continues. I've had experiences of just having jobs practically handed to me out of the blue and of ardently praying and then receiving an answer laid out before me which required detailed and persistent follow through. One job seemed so directly arranged by spiritual forces that the initial interview for that job remains one of the most vivid spiritual experiences of my life. I am letting these past experiences serve as an assurance in times of doubt.

I'll just keep praying and knocking on doors. I will cherish the moments of encouragement I receive and let them inspire me, even when they don't pan out the way I might want. I'll keep my heart and mind focused on work as worship; by serving mankind I serve God. I'll be open to the guidance and strength to carry out what I come to believe is God's will for my work life.

Wild Strawberries

Here's a parable that inspires me. It's a reminder to be aware of the joy in the moment.

A traveler was walking along life's path when a tiger began chasing her. She ran, but found herself blocked at the edge of a cliff, the tiger on one side and the cliff on the other. As her mind raced to decide which direction to go the ground gave out from under her and she began to fall. She reached out and grabbed a root that protruded from the cliff face and she hung on for dear life with both hands, only to find that within a matter of seconds the root began to give way. The tiger snarled above her; jagged rocks threatened below her. At that moment she spied a clump of wild strawberries ripening on the side of the cliff near her hand. Her mind calmed and fear left her. She reached out with one hand, picked them and ate them, savoring their sweetness and flavor.

Moral: Let go of the fear so you can grab the joy.

Today, Lord, let me see the wild strawberries and gobble them up. Let me taste the sweetness of life. Let me experience gratitude in the here and now. Let me remember that NO MATTER WHAT you hold me in the palm of your hand.

Children

This quote expresses my deepest feelings about my children. I used to have a cassette tape that had these words set to music. I lost it and have since searched for it from time to time. EVERY SINGLE TIME I listened to it my eyes welled with tears and I felt the burning and brilliant shining of love in my heart.

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts.

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;

For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

~from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran



It's the last line that touches me most deeply. I feel my love for my children and know something of God's love for them. Then, I am assured He loves me even as He loves them. I know this is an infinite love because I know that's the kind of love I have for my children. How much greater must God's love be?

image from outsider-artists.net

Luck

Here is another story that has helped me detach and not judge the events of my life.

A man owned a beautiful stallion and his neighbors often remarked on how lucky he was to own such a fine horse.

To this he replied, "Maybe, maybe not," and he went about his business.

One day the stallion broke out and ran away. His neighbors came by and remarked on how unlucky he was that he had lost the fine horse.

To this he replied, "Maybe, maybe not," and he went about his business.

A few weeks later the stallion returned leading a small herd of wild mares. The man corralled them and his neighbors came by and remarked on how lucky he was that fate had bestowed upon him such a find herd of horses.

"Maybe, maybe not."

He went about the business of breaking the horses along with his only son. His son was thrown by one of the wild horses while he was breaking it to ride. The fall broke his thigh. Of course, the neighbors expressed their opinions about how unlucky the man was that this series of events had resulted in his son's injury.

"Maybe, maybe not," was the man's only reply and he continued breaking the horses by himself while his son recuperated.

Before his son's broken bone healed, war broke out in the country and when all the able-bodied young men were conscripted to serve in the military the son was passed over by the draft because of his injury. Now, the neighbors came by and said, "You are so lucky your son does not have to serve in this unjust and futile war."

"Maybe, maybe not,"

free background image from art.blogspot.com

Mandala

I drew a mandala. It seems to be a holistic representation of the thought patterns that are leading me into a new place in life. I won't attempt to interpret what I learned about mandalas, but there are many sources of information. There seem to be two basic kinds, healing and teaching. I think mine is a combination of both. It's self-expression, just for me, a kind of meditation.

The Raft

I heard a story recently about a traveler who built a raft to cross a raging river on her journey through life. She reached the other side successfully. Thinking she might need the raft again, she kept it and ended up carrying it for the rest of her life.

This is what we humans do. During times of tests or danger we build habits or ways of thinking that protect or sustain us. Then, we keep these long past the time of their usefulness. During times of high stress we may try to use these old ways when it is new ways that are needed.

It is the same with material possessions. We need, or at least think we need, certain items during particular times or for particular uses in our lives. Then, we may keep them long past the time of their usefulness. They weigh us down and hamper our development and mobility.

I have resisted materialism all my life, only to find it has crept in quietly and infected my life. As for any malady, there is a healing that needs to take place. I think, now, that materialism is just as insidious as racism and the healing starts with scrubbing out the old wound.

Happiness

"I believe that satisfaction, joy and happiness are the ultimate purposes of life. And the basic sources of happiness are a good heart, compassion, and love." The Dalai Lama



Today I saw this quote on a blog that I want to revisit: mariposapsychotherapy.blogspot.com. For the past several years I have worked as an educator in connection with the mental health profession and I miss my former co-workers dearly. Visiting this sight seemed almost like a visit with them. As I write this I am reminded again that every change involves a loss of the former so the new can come into being. I have said my former job was like spiritual boot camp. It was an adventure and a challenge. It brought me a sense of satisfaction and I believe it helped me develop spiritually. It helped sustain me through a difficult period in my life and through the work I developed professional skills that I may use to move myself into this new phase of my life, here in a different community. The author uses the symbol of a butterfly as a recurring theme of metamorphosis and transformation. Again, I am reminded of the inspiration people receive from nature. Are the struggles I'm currently experiencing simply the hard work of emerging from the chrysalis? Maybe if I visualize myself as a butterfly...

image from csslara.com

Threads

I feel like I'm picking up the threads of my life and beginning again. Maybe this blog is helping me find a pattern. I want to stick to my original purpose. It is a part of my creative process to move within a structure.

It seems I prefer to post about twice a week. So, today I'm making a commitment to myself to do that. It's just a loose commitment, just a pattern to keep me going. (I think of this fabric I'm weaving as gauze-like, floating on the breeze.) I've used writing in that way in my life before. I've gone through periods of time where I've written stories. I like to collect stories that inspire me, too. I try to commit them to memory so I can retell them, though I'm not very good at it. They are my souvenirs of life.

I've written quite a lot of poetry, probably enough to fill a comfortable sized volume. Sometimes I think of compiling it. Would it be simply for my own self expression?

A Borrowed Affirmation

"I am...discovering how to embrace and honor all the experiences that life has to offer me, even those I choose to let go."~~Sacha Stephens-Avery

Healing Prayer

Check out artist Allen Tyrone at http://projectmelody.org/. I wanted to upload his rendition of the Long Healing Prayer, but it was too long. He offers some beautiful free downloads.

Happy Valentine's Day

I am so in love!













image from outsider-artists.net

A New Sister

This moving to another area has had a domino effect. Some changes are bittersweet. For one, my dearest friend who has been easily accessible because she was my neighbor, is no longer close by. This has been a great loss for me. Over a period of years that nearly spans the lifetimes of our children we had often walked miles in the early morning hours. I shared detailed aspects of my life with her I would not have shared with any other person. We have had a truly spiritual friendship, helping one another to stay on the right path. She never hesitated to tell me when she thought I was wrong, but I always knew she was in my corner. It is her companionship I miss the most. I will always remember the beauty of walking along the riverside in the early morning cool and spotting cranes in the water through the rising mist.

Such moments of companionship just cannot be a constant now for us at this distance.

So, I recently told her in one of our phone conversations that she has now simply become my sister, that I see no other solution. She was gracious enough to agree that's good.

Two Things

Today I'm going to concentrate on doing two things that I need to get done even though I don't really want to face them. I'm going to go into this with no expectations, knowing that I may make mistakes and that things may not turn out as I would like.

Strive

video from amessageinabottle.ca